Monday, March 23, 2009

Seriously, Can I Just Have ONE Normal Day?

My car hit a wall.
A man tried to scam me.
My acupuncturist saw my breasts.

Does anyone have any heroin I could borrow?

19 comments:

  1. WHAT?! I hope you are okay.
    I already commented on the breast thing in my comment on your last post. Oops, I guess they ran into one...
    I'm sure you can find some heroin if you just hang out at the local grade school playground for a while.

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  2. Suzy- you've got some 'splainin' to do!
    Do tell!

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  3. I have special covered cherries I can send :-)

    Are you okay, were you in the car when it hit the wall...how can he see your boobies Isn't your pain down further?

    I am so confused!

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  4. Hit a real wall or a proverbial wall? Either way, sucks immensely. I'm typically not very generous with my heroin, but I'm willing to make an exception here.

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  5. Holy Toledo, Suzy, we've got to fix your karma. I'm looking forward to the detailed blog post (I'm assuming you're okay since you're writing!).

    I do have some extra Vicodin, though :)

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  6. jesus- if we go anywhere together I AM DRIVING.

    Now put your shirt back on.

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  7. was the scam to do with the wall...or the breasts...or neither...

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  8. Anonymous4:48 AM

    Sure, I've got some heroin for you. But first, I'm gonna need to see your tits.

    Again.

    Boss O xxxx

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  9. Anonymous4:53 AM

    why you flashing your acupunturist? what happened? and i'm doing better today so no doc- J had this last week...except she bounced right back after a day...and the office thing? he's excited for it. :)

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  10. Look on the bright side, if this shit didn't happen to you, you'd have nothing to write about, and then I'd be bored. And we can't have that, can we?

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  11. It'll be a really bad day when your podiatrist sees your breast.

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  12. At least your acupuncturist had a good day. Don't bogart my heroin.

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  13. That does sound like a truly crappy day. I prescribe alcohol.

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  14. Can I be your Acupuncturist?!? Just give me some time to figure out what to do with the needles...

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  15. Ha ha ha. You people won't be happy until I blog my funeral.

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  16. Aww, sugar, I'm sorry - that's a sucky, sucky day. No heroin here, but I could maybe spare some Cadbury Mini Eggs...

    I hope tomorrow's a better one.

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K

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  17. I read this post after the detailed post and I have to say your summary is just as hilarious as the real thing.

    Well, you're just damn funny anyway. I bet you could blog about a page in a phone book and it would be funny.

    Also, I think that scammer guy probably had heroine at the place he wanted to take you.

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  18. You fucking slay me... I am so glad I am catching up.. FINALLY!

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  19. Anonymous12:54 PM

    I don't have any herion but I keep my crack pipe within reach.

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