Friday, March 21, 2008

It's Everyone Can Bite Me Friday!

Two hours at the internist today. My blood pressure was 2 million over 1 million. So then he gave me Xanax and it dipped to 54 over 13. Sixty Xanax! With one refill! What surgery?

I've always wondered if anyone out there has a foolproof way to signal to another driver you know you're in the wrong. Driving to the doctor I was trying to cross 2 lanes in one block length amid bumper to bumper traffic so I could make a left hand turn. I had my turn signal on and was trying to ease over when a huge SUV came roaring up on me and started honking. He slowed up at the last minute and I flashed him the peace sign in my rear view. That has become my de facto mea culpa in the last few years. When the SUV saw that I had to make an immediate turn he zoomed past me and flashed me the peace sign. And kept his arm out the window for almost 5 seconds, still flashing the peace sign. First time that's ever happened.

Driving back from the doctor, a guy was honking at the car in front of him because he wasn't making the right on red that is legal in California. Not Turning Guy got out of his car and was screaming at Honking Guy. Honking Guy was yelling something but wisely chose to stay in his car. I wanted to give Screaming Guy some of my Xanax but hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Uh no.

If there was a contest to see who got up in the middle of the night to pee the most, I would win hands down. The idea that I have to do this on crutches, in the dark, for three months, makes me weep. And since I'm an insomniac, I can't be up too long in the middle of the night because I'll wake up and then be awake for the rest of the night. Can't wait!

Here's an at-home tip for all people who cut their own hair. Do not cut it dry when there is static electricity in the air. Trust me on this one.

My numb tingly hand disease has gone away.

This has been the worst week of allergies I've ever had in LA. When I first moved here I got some weird ones. One year I couldn't stop scratching my calves until they bled. And I'm not talking about baby cows here. The next year I got a cough that would accelerate into a vicious choke and friends would ask if they should standby for CPR. This year it has just made my eyes get all puffy and red and I feel like I'm dragging a truck behind me. In one 3 day period I took 15 Benadryl and they barely worked.

I never talk about politics because it normally bores me and people never change their minds about what they think about religion or politics so it's just a waste of time. But I'm so OVER Barack Obama. For the love of God man, if you mention the words "It's time for a change" once more I will lose it. WE KNOW IT. Eight years of Bush; even dead people know it. And for the love of all that is human and left wing, right after 9/11 I knew ONE person who opposed the war, my friend Gail in Florida. Everyone else, including those of us who actually lived in NYC, we believed Bush and thought it was the right thing to do. We know better now since Bush got caught in his lies. So if your entire bitch slap is about Hillary voting for the war SEVEN YEARS AGO, man up and let it go. If you're really that naive to think that Bush wouldn't have started the war without the approval of Congress, then I have nothing to say to you except you really don't understand politics. Or the Bush Family Robinson. My Dad worked for the government and one of my best friends works at Homeland Security. What the American people don't know about what's going on would fill the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans.

And FYI, George W's entire campaign the very first year was him yammering about how we needed a change. And guess what? We got one!

I've been invited to post at Scrivel so I'll be alerting you in the future to go read my words falling on deaf ears over there.

End of chat.

19 comments:

  1. If we would have known each other back then you would have known 2 people who opposed the war.

    Yes, that Xanax knows how to do its job!

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  2. Suzy -- Sorry your week sounds like a crapfest (although yea! on the numbness going away). Too bad about the peeing thing. It's hard enough for me to stay asleep at night without having to answer the call of nature. I've stopped drinking water after 3PM. Cripes, I sound like an old lady.

    I love your peace sign idea for driving, but I bet if I used that, someone wouldn't see the second finger up and would think I was flipping them the bird and then things wouldn't go well after that.

    120 Xanax? Make 'em count.

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  3. You are mixing up 2 different wars. Right after 9/11, it was Afghanistan. Most people backed that. Way later, Bush was claiming that Iraq had something to do with Al Quaeda, which many people knew was wrong. Bush was just looking for an excuse to go after Hussein, influenced as he was by the neo-cons he surrounded himself with. I never backed the Iraq war, and many others I know didn't either. And our congresspeople and senators are paid to be better informed than we are. They made a mistake and they should admit it. The Afghanistan war did not hurt our standing in the world; but the unnecessary, unpopular Iraq war has.

    But you are right - whether Hillary voted for it or not is nothing for Barak to build a campaign on.

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  4. But didn't Bush say there were WMD in Afghanistan and that's why we had to go in? That is the lie I'm talking about. And I supported that war based on that information. That those WMD were going to be used against us in the future.

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  5. I've always opposed war, but mainly because men have always been for war. If men weren't any longer allowed to vote or participate in politics, what do you think would happen? Uh-Huh... There would be no more war. And everything in the world would be designer decorated and that should make everyone happy enough to quit all the crap. Oh wait! That won't stop the terrorists, will it? Okay, then we'll just have to torture them with hours & hours of shopping with American women who love to shop. That should have them cross-eyed & babbling in tongues in no time. Then, we'll have them where we want them.

    Seriously though, a lot of us bought into the Bush pitch and have had to kind of pretend we were right, even though we went with the wrong team. However, it's pretty clear by now, that was a pipe dream for Georgie Porgie. Time to move on to the next dilemma.

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  6. Anonymous5:05 AM

    I'm with several of your commenters in that I supported the war in Afghanistan against the Taliban but I opposed the unilateral unprovoked attack against Iraq that made the world view the US as a warmongering pariah. But I found it very interesting that W in doofus mode chose to attack the only country in his self-declared axis of evil that did not actually have any WMD's.

    But I have to disagree with 'women only politicians' wouldn't allow wars. Have you forgotten Margaret Thatcher, Golda Meir and Indira Gandhi? Warriors all.

    Great post - thanks Yeah, Barack needs to man-up and get over the Hillary-voted thing but I'm betting it gets worse for the general election campaign since McCain also voted for it and continues bizarrely to support and defend it.

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  7. Primadonna, I'm just sick and tired of men being in charge. It's time for a change all right, a female one and every woman in the workplace should be supporting Hillary. SAHM aren't out there being overlorded by men every minute of the day, so they may not know or relate to what I'm talking about, but trust those of us out of the house, it's time for a change. The only people who ever helped me in my career are women.

    Men only help each other, even if you're more talented than their friends, they'll help them over me. Fuck em.

    I think women can handle war. After all, the Armed Forces has just ALLOWED them in the 2000's to foray out into pilots. Sheesh, I'm so over these men in charge.

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  8. I'm quite sick of the whole thing myself. I'm sick of Bush. I'm sick of Hillary, Barack and John. I'm sick of this economy. I'm sick of the complainers. The only people doing anything truly helpful are the folks you never hear about. Woo hoo! It's everyone can bite me Saturday!

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  9. Anonymous12:43 PM

    I was a fan of the Clintons until this campaign. Clearly, they'll do or say anything to get back into power, even if it ultimately damages the Democratic party. Hillary has convinced too many people (either intentionally or unintentionally) that if Obama ends up being the nominee, they should vote for McCain. That's just wrong.

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  10. Anonymous2:54 PM

    A left hand turn?
    A left hand turn in LA?
    A left hand turn..HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    STOP IT YOU'RE KILLING ME!

    A LEFT HAND TURN!

    Suzy, that is the funniest thing I have read since I left Hollywood.

    I have tears running down my eyes.

    A left hand turn...

    chandler in lasvegas

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  11. Hey, this post wasn't there when I checked from work last night.
    How the hell did you get that many Xanax? I have an appt with my doc to get some, since I have to go visit family on Passover.
    Go Girl Power!

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  12. Surcie! What?????? Never heard Hillary make or infer that. And believe me, I momentarily thought about voting for McCain if Obama gets the nod. Obama is just not ready or qualified. I think he'd make a good VP, that's it. If Hillary doesn't get it, I will not vote. I've voted for my LAST male in public office.

    See a female president in office before you die, because this will probably be your last chance.

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  13. I must apologize. I believe my evil twin left that last message. The bitch has been stalking me too. Because it's my personal politics to NEVER EVER talk politics. So, it had to have been her, not me.

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  14. I agree about the "change" blah, blah, blahhhhh, but have you noticed his butt? Very sweet....

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  15. Politics: either one of the Dems is better than McCain. I'm not too thrilled with either one (for different reasons that we don't need to go into), but they're both better then Bush version 2. I don't care who gets the Democratic nomination, I'll vote for them rather than let McCain take it. I just wish they had "Do-Over" as an option on the ballot.

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  16. Anonymous10:58 PM

    I CANNOT GET OVER HOW FUNNY YOU ARE. OH EM GEE! LoL

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  17. I thought the whole point to moving to California was that no one has allergies there.

    Wait, am I commenting on the wrong post? I think I am.

    Bush and the things the American people don't know .... my dad worked for Army Missile Command building weapons of mass destruction for his entire career. He had a lot to say, but it was all classified, so we only got to hear the edited parts. But I have 2 friends in the CIA and 2 in the Secret Service (not the same guys) and they have a few things to say, too. Of course, that has nothing to do with my commenting here, but I like to brag about knowing these people.

    Whether it's time for a change or not, 2 terms is all anyone gets. I mean, unless you're Bill Clinton in which case you argue for an except to be made just for you. But other than that, even if no one thought it was time for a change, we're getting one, 'cause for good or for bad, Bush's time is up.

    Here is the change I would like to see. I would like to see a new president who isn't a lawyer and was never a corporate CEO. I would like to see Al Pacino become president. I would like to see Putin try to argue with Pacino that our missile defense system, ala Ronald Reagan's 'Star Wars' program, is somehow a threat to Russia and must be dismantled. Yeah, are YOU tawlkin' to me?

    OK, so maybe it wasn't Pacino who did that line. Putin won't know the difference.

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