So the story jumps forward, after the VCR incident.
I've always been a terrible sleeper. Earplugs, night mask, blackout shades, a sound machine and 2 Unisom a night sometimes all kick in and I can finally sleep.
One night I got up to pee in the middle of the night and saw a pinkish glow coming from my living room. More curious than fearful I walked towards the pink light and realized the stereo was on and since it rotates colors when it's on, blue, red, orange, pink, it was on the pink cycle. As I got closer, I saw that it was not only on but the lid was open.
What's so weird about that?
I hadn't left it on. I can barely sleep so if there's a pink glow coming from my living room I would have noticed. The buttons on this cheap $100. stereo are behind the CDs so you have to move them to turn it on. When I found the lid open, the CDs were all flush against the stereo. I thought maybe I had absent-mindedly used the remote. I keep it near my desk, opposite the stereo. I found the remote in the bottom of a basket 2 shelves down. It took me 14 seconds to even locate the "Open Lid" function. It was definitely not me. It was comforting to know Alzheimers had not moved in.
I turned it off and went back to bed. I woke up the next day and still couldn't figure out how the stereo had turned itself on.
A few months later I was in a deep sleep. Suddenly I heard talking. In my bedroom. I opened my eyes and saw that the TV had turned itself on. This time I was scared and sat bolt upright. I searched for the remote. Had I rolled over it? Where the hell was it? In a drawer in one of my side tables. If I tossed and turned I would have had to launch myself 2 feet in mid air to get to that remote. In a drawer. I'm pretty sure that would have woken me up.
I walked into the kitchen and got a hammer. Not a little hammer but a full grown huge manly man hammer. I have no idea why I didn't grab a knife but I thought, a knife will produce blood and then I'd have to clean up AND go to prison. But I reasoned a hammer would just produce a huge hurty hole in the body of...of... of WHO?
I was shaking. Who was in the bedroom? I crept slowly back to bed, turned off the TV and kept the hammer and a flashlight in the bed with me. Not cuddlers, I can tell you that.
What the hell was going on in my apartment?
And then the TV turned itself on again in the middle of the night almost 2 months later. And they were talking about Los Angeles Mayor's Anthony Villaragosa's divorce. If that was a clue, it was lost on me. And then the stereo turned itself on again.
End of chat.