Enough Already With The Log-Ins And The Sign-Ups And The Comment Moderations

Someone nominated me for something. This person was also nominated. I tried to vote for her and in the time it took me to locate my password (which I didn't find) get my screen name right (never happened even with an underscore) or tried to sign in via Twitter (I'm not registered as Suzy Soro) or Blogger (they said I'm not a member of blogspot (are you fucking kidding me?) or Facebook (it's only a fan page and I still hate them) I went out on my balcony and tried to decide whether to jump or move to Albania, where they probably don't have the internet. (don't write me if they do and I'd like to apologize in advance to Albania if they have the internet) (I'm mainly apologizing if you also have to do the sign-up log-in type 2 words to make sure you're not a bot thingamajig)

So where did these passwords and log-ins disappear to? They're probably in one of the millions of emails from websites (in the 16 online filing cabinets I've kept over the years AND NO I'M NOT A HOARDER PUT DOWN THE PHONE TO A & E)  where they've answered my question: WHAT THE FUCK IS MY PASSWORD LOG-IN INFORMATION?

I'm not posting a link to where you could vote for me because you'll need to sign up for an account or vote via Twitter, Blogger, Facebook or your Cap'n Crunch cereal box. And I like you too much for that.

I will never vote on a site that makes me sign up for an account and in the past I've sent the following form letter to all the bloggers who've asked me to vote for them on some variation of Make Me Famous Please I'm Desperate.com:

I don't want another password. I have over 87. I don't want another account. I have over 255. Don't reply to this form letter and admonish me for not duplicating passwords on multiple accounts BECAUSE I ALREADY DO THAT. I've been online since 1998. Please do that math. I'm sure you'll win without my vote because you're the prettiest.

I'm done.

After Everyone Has Talked About BlogHer, I Get Around To It

When I went to BlogHer in the beginning of August, I didn't really go to BlogHer. If you know me at all, I'm not much of a joiner or a follower. I'm kind of a loner which is, I believe, how serial killers get started.

So I made up something called BlogHer Adjacent. A send-up of what people who live heartbeats away from Beverly Hills call where they live, Beverly Hills Adjacent. They made up that name rather than admit they didn't make the cutoff to 90210.

So I tweeted that I'd be in the lobby of the Marriott Hotel from 2 pm until late that evening on the Saturday of BlogHer and asked people to DM me their cell phone numbers. And they did. Poor bastards didn't even see it coming.

I met some of my favorite people, bloggers I'm sure you know and love. Well, at least know.

Like these people and these people and her and these people (plus the back of Jenn's head which I forgot to note in the original picture. She was also my gracious host on Friday night and let me sleep in her guest room). I also met her and these people. And this duo, one of whom I picked up at LAX the Tuesday before BlogHer. Don't you hate people who link like this? People tell me not to do it this way because it drives traffic away from my site. Please, there are plenty of things that drive traffic away from my site without obnoxious linking.

This photo was taken at the table I commandeered in front of the Marriott Starbucks. I looked up to see someone crossing the lobby wearing my tee shirt and couldn't believe it. Then I recognized her from her blog.

When I asked her why she was wearing my shirt she replied that everything else was dirty. SO FLATTERED.

She bought a tee shirt a long time ago and never sent me a picture of herself wearing it. Turns out she didn't realize the upside to buying a shirt was a link on my sidebar and the opportunity to be seen by tens of people.

Since I've been so late posting this, I decided to leave her picture and link to her blog up until I sell another shirt, or get a few of the people who already have shirts to send in their pictures.

Cough cough Vodkamom.

Her blog is funny. You should read it. She free-associates like no one else.