How To Write A Funny Blog Part 2 HUMOR V. FUNNY

Remind me again why I thought it was a good idea to write this series. Thanks.

How about an example of a persona? Let's use Dooce.

We know she loves her husband Jon, her two dogs and her two children. But her deconstructed persona has her throwing objects at Jon's head, dangling one of their dogs over boiling edamame water and placing things on Chuck's head. This is where she distinguishes herself because she knows her deconstructed self. That and she's a brilliant writer, which most bloggers aren't.

Full Disclosure: I don't know Dooce, she wrote me back once with the word 'thanks' in the email and if she did know me might run screaming into the Utah night with Chuck on her head.

Back in the 80's Carol Leifer and I used to walk out of Catch A Rising Star and go next door to a raunchy bar with a bowling alley. We'd trash men all night and laugh our asses off. One day she called me and asked me to be on her first TV show Leifer Madness. When I showed up on set, after hair and makeup, Carol said, "Oh my God, what did they do to you?" They made me up with a turban and a housecoat so I looked like my part, the apartment manager. My lines were tragic and boring. Carol was upset and said, "NO, I wanted the girl at the bar, she's who I hired." She had hired my persona, not the real me. The show failed. I blame her. (love you Carol, mean it)

And here is where I should point out that men never really think women are funny. Fuckers.

Being a humor blogger is not a bad thing, but it is much harder to be funny than to be humorous. Humor is when you walk away thinking, 'Oh, that's cute.' Funny is when you walk away and can't stop laughing, tell it to your friends and generally annoy the shit out of everybody with your stupid funny joke.

My pet peeve in this category is the sheer volume of people who refer to themselves as humor writers. And if they're on those aggregate humor lists who take anyone who applies. GET OUT.(I joined one and but got HIRED for another one. After that, I joined no lists) They have other bloggers judge your writing, bloggers with no credentials, nothing published and worst of all, strangers kissing ass with very little sense of humor. If you read some of these websites you realize they're taking page views and Google ranking off your work. If you see The Onion or David Sedaris's name on a list, sign up for that one. Otherwise, write a novel. If I can do it, anyone can. Or write a screenplay, if I can do it, so can you.

P.S. But they are very hard to write. I should change my title from "I Fucked A Priest" to something a little more Disney. Agreed?

Tomorrow, Timing