Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Pom Pon Girls Are WAY Overrated Don't You Think?

I bought this jacket five or six years ago, maybe longer. There's a fabulous vintage shop on Hollywood Blvd. called Iguana, on the way to the Sunday Farmer's Market. I used to spend Sundays first at the shop than walk over to the market. This vintage emporium has so much stuff that they put the clothes they no longer want or think won't sell in a huge pile in the alley behind the store. Each item in the pile is one dollar. The back story is I never made Pom Pons in high school. Made it down to the last callbacks and it was all o v e r. I was so upset that my mother comforted me by telling me we were going to move to Switzerland where I would for sure get into Pom Pons THERE. Seriously, does anyone else have a mental patient for a mother?

When I bought this jacket I was so delirious with joy that I called another Pom Pon reject, the friend I've had since the second grade, Jamey. (and no I don't know if it's one pom or two poms I only know I didn't MAKE IT so stop asking me) I tortured her by bragging about my jacket. To give you an idea about how bitter we were, we once went down to the high school AFTER OUR COLLEGE DAYS and Jamey bought some fake Pom Pons and we took pictures of ourselves in front of the gym door WHERE ALL THE POM PONS GIRLS HAD THEIR EYEBALLS EATEN OUT BY ARSON-PRONE CATS AND THEN DIED IN A FIRE WHICH THEY TOTALLY DESERVED.

I was thrilled with this jacket even though it had another girl's name on the front. Jill.

So man up, McLoserstene. I just outed you. Without your head, as per your instructions. You look better headless and you and I both know it.

If you people never hear from me again, you'll know why although a lot of you figured it out from our other job on my sidebar: Professional Money Spenders.

I met her at around the same time I bought the coat. I wore it a couple of times and when her 30th was looming I took it out to show her. She was TWO YEARS OLD when some whore of a Pom Pon girl was underneath the bleachers with the captain of the football team wearing this jacket and swallowing. (that even grossed me out and I'm ungrossoutable)

So I gave my $1.00 jacket to her yesterday for her birthday and it fits HER better than it fit me which I find ENORMOUSLY irritating.

Her brother's nickname as a kid was Jamie.

End of chat.

14 comments:

  1. "HAD THEIR EYEBALLS EATEN OUT BY ARSON-PRONE CATS AND THEN DIED IN A FIRE WHICH THEY TOTALLY DESERVED."

    It's reasons like this I love you.

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  2. I agree, Pompon girls are overrated . But cheerleaders...now's there's a group of

    How very sweet of you to pass along your treasured jacket.

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  3. I still have my cheerleading jacket from when I graduated in 1978 and it's not even a 1/10 as cool as that one!
    You're crazy - I would have kept it!

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  4. I hated anything cheery in highschool and wanted to kick them each time I walked by them...I was a jock through and through- I almost grew a set of balls..wait- I think I might have. :)

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  5. I think the possibility exists that you might be nice under your "bite me" exterior.

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  6. Is it really "pom pon?" I thought it was "pom pom." What's a pon? For that matter, what's a pom?

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  7. You could probably guess that I was no Pom Pon or Cheerleader at any time in my life. I did make-out with a lot of their boyfriends though.

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  8. We didn't have pom-pons girls (or pom-pom girls, for that matter). But we did call the band geeks Q-tips b/c they wore tall white hats.

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  9. A DOLLAR?!?!? What part of Sunset is this vintage shop of which you speak? I still got a couple of days in town...

    And I never met an arson-prone cat I didn't like.

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  10. Anonymous12:01 PM

    S,
    McL has a great friend in you. That jacket is fab. But on the other side, it was probably very thick and took up lots of closet space, so now you have room for new outfits.
    Aloha,
    MJ

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  11. Cool jacket. Cheerleaders didn't even get jackets in high school at my school. Just the boy sports. There. That ought to really piss you off.

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  12. I never made the poms team either, or the cheerleading team for that matter. They mocked me when I tried to do the jump splits and landed with an audible thud. Snooty bitches.

    Your friend should take it to an emboiderer and have them take Jill's name off and put hers on. That's what I would do anyway if I had a coat like that.

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  13. margeys6:13 PM

    well, now i feel stupid 'cause wikipedia says "pom pon" is derived from the french word "pompon", meaning spherical ornament. who knew. i thought they spelled it wrong and was ready to have an annoying english grammar/spelling nazi laugh at their expense.

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  14. French sailors wear these cool navy blue flat berets with a red pompon on top. It sounds bad but women try to steal them all the time. The French word is lined together, the American one is not.

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