Friday, October 23, 2009

It's Everybody Can Bite Me Friday!

I am obsessed with cheating men this week because I recently found out that a celebrity couple I know divorced. They separated in 2005 and divorced 3 years later. The shock of this divorce hit me because I remembered a Thanksgiving at an SNLers' house a long time ago. This same married couple were sitting in front of the fire and he was telling us a story about his wife, lounging two feet away on a couch. He ended it with "I know in my heart and my soul that my mission in life was to take care of this woman. I felt that God sent me to her to protect her. All the rest doesn't matter."

My sister and I exchanged a glance and made the Awwwwwwwwwww face together. We're mental, I know.

Out of this same group of people, two are dead, another couple divorced and another one cheated on his wife, in their NY apartment, in their New York bed with the daughter of a famous clothing designer. That last couple stayed together, moved out of LA and NY and his cheating was never mentioned. We used to sit around and wonder how his wife never blabbed about it. To any of us. We all knew but in deference to her never brought it up. And it never made the press, like Dave Letterman, John Edwards, Rudy Guiliani, Sanford, Spitzer et alia. And it should have, based on his fame.

Like a lot of women, I'm watching The Good Wife with Juliana Marguiles and Chris Noth. He cheated and abused his power in office and went to jail. The wife luckily got a job in a law firm and also weighs about 120 pounds and is easy on the eye. How many women could leave their cheating spouses and ease into her life?

Sidebar: And talk about your photoshopping. New York Magazine took away her upper arms, upper left thigh, her butt and lengthened her neck. Marguiles looks DEMENTED.

My parents were not happily married and they should have divorced. Their decision affected my life. I tend to stay with people who make me unhappy. I don't have the courage to leave. I replay my parents' madness over and over.

Many bloggers confess their cheating to me. I think it's because I remind them of Mother Theresa with my lack of judgments and frequent trips to countries where I bless the poor.

We had family friends a long time ago. The husband was your typical charismatic narcissist, a prime suspect for cheating. And he was a lawyer so you know how tricky they are.

When she discovered he was cheating on her she tried to kill herself and then went to a plastic surgeon and had a full face lift.

The irony was that he came back to her and turned into a raging drunk. He then died while she went on to date another man. His best friend.

If you're unhappy, leave.

End of chat.

29 comments:

  1. I'm staying for the children.

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  2. Left. Three times.

    Thank Gawd!

    Don't wanna do it again, but I would if I had to.

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  3. I left the cheater!

    Enjoy a nice week-end Suzy :D

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  4. It is sad to go from "my mission in life was to take care of her ... All the rest doesn't matter" to "We're getting divorced." On the other hand, that caretaker role can get old pretty fast, if there's nothing coming back the other way (which the "all the rest doesn't matter" line might indicate).

    Obviously I don't know these people, or even know who they are; I don't know the context for why the line was said; and I have no idea what happened in their relationship.

    But even that seemingly sweet line looks, to me, like a disguised way of saying "I'm giving and giving in this relationship and I love playing the rescuer role" - which is just massive trouble brewing if folks aren't careful....

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  5. -->I was called the homewrecker by my husband's ex-wife. Meanwhile, they were Divorced. She's an idiot every day and twice on Sundays.

    I wish you'd share names of these people.

    Also, that picture is Scary. Her head looks like a bowling ball sitting on top of a broomstick.

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  6. Cheating has becoming 'socially acceptable' in most circles, especially for men. Now, I'm not saying that's right and detest the double standard...but it's there.

    Men try to embellish their sexual prowess with water-cooler stories of extramaritial sex to other men and some women. It just signals to me you can't honor your vow to another person.

    Not happy? Should have thought about that before walking the aisle!

    My first post here. I'm a little giddy because I'm a HUGE Seinfeld fan!

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  7. I like Juliana Marguiles. But you're right-- that picture looks like they Flynn Boyled her.

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  8. Too old.

    I love your "Sign of the times."

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  9. Anonymous11:20 AM

    I am here to report I have never cheated on my cat. He loves me, and only me, unlike most of the other males in my life.
    Aloha, MJ

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  10. i never understood 'cheating', on any level, even when cheated on... why go into a relationship when one, the other, or both, have no intention of staying committed, from the getgo?

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  11. Never a cheater. Not in my nature. But I do have a very racy fantasy life!

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  12. Always a breath of fresh air around here...

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  13. Well hell's bells, well put and amen sistah!

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  14. I'm with MadMad on this one. I would never leave my husband just to go clean some other guy's toilet.

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  15. A bowling ball on a broomstick--that's it. I usually just call them lollipop people.

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  16. That is one scary airbrush!!
    I have the episodes of the Good Wife on PVR guess its time to start watching!

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  17. Suzy,
    My parents stayed married years past the time they should have divorced. I think that is one reason my picker is broke. I kept trying to fix men. Yeah every one of them would cheat on me then say "well if you gave me better blow jobs..." or "if you weren't so demanding that I pick my dirty underwear up off the dining table..." then I wouldn't cheat. Um DUDE you would have cheated if I gave you head 24-7 and picked all your dirty clothes up AND washed them for you.

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  18. Marriage is overrated.

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  19. Oh Suzy - (wait, trying to come up with a witty comment here, hang on, no, nothing coming, sorry)

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  20. I didn't leave - I stayed here and made HIM leave. I never cheated. I never would have. I have never in my life broken a promise or a vow, and I never will. He accused me of wanting to step out, called me a cheat and a liar. I was neither.

    One of the deciding factors was that I didn't want my son to think that the relationship he saw was a healthy one, was what a marriage should be.

    I wasn't the one with a girlfriend, sexually active, within two weeks of the decision to divorce.

    Mizz Suzy, thanks to you on the rare occasions I look at magazine covers, I look for evidence of air-brushing. I saw one of Drew Barrymore that was insane. She's already beautiful - she doesn't need "retouching"!!

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K

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  21. I think I would leave; the trust would be gone, and without it I wouldn't be happy. It's hard for me to trust people, and I have a bad tendency of believing that someone can't possibly care as much for me as they say, so by cheating on me it would pretty much prove that to me and so: done. I guess I'm just too insecure to be that insecure. : )

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  22. Since I'm married to a cheater, can I get a free air brushing? Every day in 3D please?

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  23. No ideas who these celebrities are?

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  24. Anonymous10:22 PM

    My mum was furious when I left my husband. Eveentually I confronted her and said "Mum, I know you think I am like you. But! Just because you stayed with Dad, and have been miserable every day of your marriage, does that mean I should aspire to that as well?"

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  25. I concur.


    now DISH. DISH. Who was it? You CANNOT leave us hanging like this.

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  26. It's strange how people are effected differently. My parents stayed together 25 years too long. I became the chick who would not tolerate one single mistake from a man. I remeber rolling my eyes as friends complained about their boyfriends and then ordering them to open their eyes and get out! Sadly, that's how I lost all of my friends in the 90s.

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  27. I think men justify cheating (to themselves) by the fact that they are staying, still holding up their end of the bargain. They know it's not right to cheat, but they don't want to be the one who leaves the marriage/relationship first. Sometimes cheating is just a way to force the hand of the other person, a calculated move. But when the woman cheats? Oh, that's an unspeakable crime. The duplicity in men never ceases to amaze me.

    I work with so many men and hear the horror stories. For the most part, men who cheat won't leave, don't want to leave. Most of the men I know resist change, even for the better, and will stay long after the music's stopped.

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  28. My dad cheated on my mom. They're still together like 45 years or something absurd. I've never cheated on a man I was married to. And I wouldn't.

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  29. You're totally like Mother Theresa, only prettier. I thought that was a black-haired Debra Harry (Blondie) at first, until I read it. Julia Marguiles my ass....

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