It's Everybody Can Bite Me Friday!

There was a plane heading to LAX yesterday that had to be diverted because a 50 year old man took off all his clothes and had to be subdued. This is what makes women superior to men in every way. We'll wear short skirts and get kicked off the plane, join the mile high club and scream at flight attendants for more booze. BUT WE WILL NEVER TAKE OFF OUR CLOTHES IN A ROOM FULL OF STRANGERS, ESPECIALLY WITH THE LIGHTS ON. Except strippers, who are smart enough to make over a grand a night for their efforts.

It's possible we all need to move to France.

My mother is in the beginning stages of macular degeneration and had to have a shot in her eyeball before she left Paris. Co-pay 15 Euros, $20 bucks. She went to a doctor here and the visit and shot? $1900. She will not move here because our healthcare system is so poor. Socialized medicine, the entire world has it but us. And YES she can choose the doctors she wants.

Did I mention Mom is staying for 2 more months? So my commenting has slowed down since I spend more time screening my calls and trying to find compassion, which I've hidden somewhere in my house.

I saw the family the other day and forgot to bring my best friend, Advil, along. Lindy was out so my mother generously offered me her pain pills. I take 2 and quiz her on how strong they are.
"Zey are not strong."
"Are you sure?"
"I take 6 a day and zey only provide an hour of relief each time."

I took 2. If mom could handle 6, I should be taking 37. She even told me I probably wouldn't feel them after all my surgeries and pain pills.

"Advil takes an hour to work."
"Zese do too."

15 minutes later I'm stoned out of my mind sitting in a chair wondering how people on TV make their mouths move.

"Mom, what's in these pills?"
"Ohhhh I don't know, morpheene I sink."

TWO MORE MONTHS.

End of chat.