There's Dying And Then There's Dying

Sinbad was on The Bonnie Hunt Show recently. There was a rumor about him a while back that he had died. So Bonnie asked him how that got started and he replied: "Someone didn't like one of my comedy shows and went to Wikipedia and said I'd died."

And by 'comedy shows' he meant my blog.

So I was nervous for my viral mortality when I got this e-mail:

Sorry, after reading that post about being attacked by her dog and stabbed by a chicken she does seem a bit more humorous than you Suz. Perhaps falling on your face is not as funny as being stabbed by a dog.

I do like your around town photos.

So me falling on my face and looking like this and using it as my Linkedin profile pic...

...is not funnier than Jenny flipping people off?

Yeah okay, maybe she wins that. In other news I think my nose is growing.

I stole the above photo from Jenny the Bloggess's website and taken by Jenny herself. I'm a little disturbed that she is passing herself off as *injured* when she can drive, take a picture of her hand and FLIP OFF PASSERSBY. In my photo I could not see out of one eye and could not drive unless it was into a building. So I'm not funnier than her but for the love of God could I at least be the more grievously injured?

The guy in that email whose name I'm hiding because I'm afraid you'll all agree with him and then I'm going to have to move to earthquake-ravaged Chile where they know the real meaning of injuries and start a blog about being kicked out of the U.S. because I'm unable to determine what is or is not a funny injury said he likes my around town photos.

Like this one, a can of Campbell's Chunky Fully Loaded Rigatoni and Meatballs soup someone left on a ledge in a parking lot. If you can figure out where the comma goes in the above paragraph then you should definitely play the lottery today.

Translation of *I do like your around town photos?* STOP WRITING. Ok, fine. I'm not going to but fine.

For those of you who don't know how I got started in standup check out this interview with me. No one gets hurt though so you might be bored.

Also? It has been brought to my attention that I get more comments when the Bloggess is in my posts. She's only been in 2 posts besides this one which makes 3 and if this is someone's subtle way of telling me that I'm not that interesting without her, DULY FUCKING NOTED.

End of chat.