Friday, May 25, 2007

Because We're Not Dead Yet - Part Three

UPDATE: Martha Jane just sent me photos of three people that I hadn't photographed so I thought I'd add them.
Kathy Buckley and Martha Jane

Ant and Diane Nichols

Rick Overton
getting ready to beat the crap out of the manager, who is hanging by his head, the only logical place to hang one from. After all, they do take 15% .

Our hosts, Elayne Boosler and her husband Bill Siddons.

When I told Bill what great artwork he had, he replied without a trace of regret, "It's all Elayne, she won't let me hang anything." Now that's a great husband who has been properly trained. Hot guy Number One, the food server, although he had his eyes closed. He's 21, my waist size. Shut up.Hot guy Number Two, the bartender. Hard to believe he's older than I am.

Only attractive people are eligible for Cater-waitering in Los Angeles. It's not unusual to go to big Hollywood events and see the guests cruising the staff. You should see our UPS drivers. Hands down, the hottest guys in L.A. We used to have one who was so hot that three of us used to order crap off EBay just so he'd come to our building. Then we'd ask him dumb questions like, "What's a stamp?" He now has a movie career.

Hiram Kasten, Karen Haber, Felicia Michaels and Martha Jane of Cocktails From Hawaii who flew in from Honolulu for the party.

Freddy Stoller, who hasn't aged one bit, which I found very annoying. Extremely annoying.

And finally, my arch enemy Jenée who has her cleavage hanging out, for a CHANGE.

I'm sorry I didn't take pictures of everyone and I apologize to those I didn't get. I think we have to hire a photographer for the next event since there were over 90 people in attendance this year and we expect a bigger turnout next year. It was just overwhelming to meet up with people we hadn't seen in many years, some of them from New York and the leaner years, and remember to take their picture. But from all the emails I've been getting from comics who don't live in L.A., they love the pictures more than my astute and brilliant commentary. Whatever.

All night long, no matter what group of comedians I was talking to, the same topic came up over and over, how great it was to get together with our own kind. You could make inappropriate jokes about loaded topics and no one flinched or called you out. You didn't have to be polite and you could swear and bitch without people staring at you with that horrified look I sometimes get when I ...never mind. I think my arch enemy Jenée said it best: "You never have to follow any sentence with just kidding."

What made this party better than every other party? Because everyone was invited, not just the white heterosexual males who hung out together back in the day. We had Black people! We had Asian people! We had women! We had gays! We had Ann Abeyta the Mexican who couldn't spell pinata! I'm never going to let that go.

End of party chat.


  1. Wow, and Lou Ferrigno was there too. How cool is that?!? :-)

  2. I am seething with envy here in the fricking DAIRYLAND with my cheese and my bratwurst and my legal fireworks. That party looks like so much fun!!! At least I can live vicariously through you...

  3. Allen Enlow3:36 PM

    Thanks for the memories. And even though you say the pictures got top billing your commentary was on an even keel...the fact that you pointed out how you could say "anything" innaproriate at your shindig sounds like such a relief! Everybody's so goddamn careful nowadays that it's suffocating. Why would Imus be fired for making an innapropriate joke when everybody knows he's not a racist- just an insensitive buffoon, like the rest of us, who made a shitty joke. And if what he said was so horrible why would every newspaper article across the country repeat the phrase "nappy headed hos?" If it was SO horrible shouldn't it have read- "N**py H**ded H*'s!
    That's why I love watching comedians roast other comedians- nothing is sacred!

    Hope I can somehow make your next party!

    ALSO-I was inspired by your Blog to get the hell out of my shell and went to Rich Jeni's memorial at Carolines here in the apple...not a party but a nice gathering and a chance to see a few old faces- Melvin George, Angela Scott, Bill Sheft, Adrian Tolsch (who actually looked younger than ever before-no joke), Diane Krauss (former PCA Lawyer), Joey Kola, Barry Weintraub, and many others who I don't know personally--"Caroline", Gilbert Godfried & his pregnant wife, Bill Boggs, Richard Belzer, Hal Speers, Jeffrey Ross. John Mulrooney was the consummate emcee with his heartfelt observations & dead-on impressions of his former roomate. Rich Jeni-- RIP

  4. When you say Mexican people, don't you mean beaners?

  5. wow that guy was hot! IS hot! and how in the world can a freaking mexican guy NOT spell pinata? What is he 6???? My half-spanish daughter can't get her shit together on that word and calls it a piano and the piano is the pinata...maybe they went to the same wayward school in heaven.

  6. "how in the world can a freaking mexican guy NOT spell pinata?"

    Uh Jane? Ann Abeyta is a chick.

  7. Ant bugs me. What was he doing there???

  8. "Ant bugs me. What was he doing there???"

    It was a party for standup comedians and he's a standup comedian.

    He's a really sweet guy. Don't believe everything you see on TV.

  9. Anonymous12:45 PM

    What a delightful gift to document the gala with photos of so many old friends I worked with and miss! My God! Billiam Cronel, Dave Edison, Fed Stoller, Jerry Diner . . . and of course the fabulous YOU! Amazing!
    I would love to arrange to be at the next one and connect with folks I have not seen since we were in the back of Michele Balatsos' van on the way to the Jersey Shore!! Thank you!!
    Will MIller

  10. Abeyta can't spell piñata?? Glue some paper to her and she could be the piñata.

    As for publishing the photo of me apparently on the verge of suffocation, I have three words for you: As-Samu 'alaikum wal-la'na!

    (or maybe that's six words)

  11. Anonymous11:37 AM

    Oh, nice. It's real nice that on Memorial Day your trying to convince the mob to hang a latina and hit her with a bat.




    Nice "umlaut."

  12. Nice "umlaut."

    Retard, an umlaut is two dots over a letter in the German language.

    The squiggly line over the n in pinata is a squiggley line over the n.

    You want to be hung up and hit with a bat, don't you?