Monday, April 26, 2010

What To Do If You Can't Afford Botox

I went into my local Beauty Supply and was lamenting the fact that Botox wasn't sold over the counter. In a cream. For $2.78.

The Beauty Supply chick recommended I try Hollywood's Beauty Secret for the forehead and between the eyes.

She assured me a lot of My People, unemployed actors who really wanted to direct but were writing a screenplay while waiting on tables, used Frownies religiously.

And by religiously I assumed she meant that My People packed them for a trip to Vatican City hoping to have them blessed by the Pope. Who really could only promise the Frownies would be having sex with underaged boys in the near future.

I wear them every night. And am surprised I have no boyfriend. And really should wash my hair more often.

End of chat.

21 comments:

  1. -->Maybe if you had a boyfriend you wouldn't be frowning at night. Do they work?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah, do they work? Thats a very nice forehead you have there : D

    ReplyDelete
  3. i think you should start taking before and after pictures everyday as long as you are using them, and then we get to see the miracle of Frownies. also, i want to see if they really work cuz then i want to buy a box cuz i buy anything that will make me look younger and prettier cuz i need to feel and look younger and prettier. good luck and take care.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wouldn't tan duct tape cut into triangles do the same thing? For a lot cheaper?

    ReplyDelete
  5. is that a third eye on your forehead?

    ReplyDelete
  6. I'll take them in a size "it's too late".


    Just fed ex them over.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm just impressed that you managed to work in the Catholic sex abuse joke. I think we should challenge you to work one in, no matter what topic we tell you to blog on for the next month. Game?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh, dear. I just don't have any faith in those Frownies. And the expensive creams really *should* have Botox in them. Hopefully, you will find work, or sell your screenplay. Or find a rich boyfriend.

    ReplyDelete
  9. The frownies would've have been EVEN BETTER had they actually had drawn in eyebrows. LIke this: \/ (but you know, with photoshop and a link and all that cool stuff). I am so writing the manufacturer. We can go 50/50 since it's your picture I'll be using.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I have found that duct tape will do the same thing plus you don't have to pluck your eyebrows. :) Win/Win...well sort of...it leaves a pretty nasty hickey on your forehead.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous4:23 AM

    I used these years ago and I still have two railroad track in the middle of my brows.

    But, you do look supercool and famous.

    ReplyDelete
  12. The box cover art implies that you'll end up looking like a Chola. Is that the look you're going for?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous10:00 AM

    I love any product with the word 'Hollywood" in it's name.
    On my last trip to LA I visited Fredrick's of Hollywood and bought three champagne bottles filled with their signature bubble bath for my friends.
    Two of my friends foolishly used the product and complained that the detergent took a layer of their skin off and that they could not wash the cheap stink off for four days.
    Suzy, do you think I should wear my nicotine patches on my forehead? Please advise.
    X David

    ReplyDelete
  14. So these things are replacements for boyfriends? Somehow it doesn't seem like a fair trade.

    You could bedazzle it and be in style. Or wear it a little lower down:
    http://www.kimberlily.com/

    ReplyDelete
  15. I'm sure your boyfriend would also be wearing one.
    You know, the one you would stick on him at night while he sleeps.

    ReplyDelete
  16. And there are boob frownies too.

    http://intimia.com/documents/60.html

    ReplyDelete
  17. holy crap, a sex patch? :O lol

    ReplyDelete
  18. I think I know what I'm buying you for your birthday. Pantene

    ReplyDelete