From the Bed, Bath and Beyond winter catalog.
I don't care if you live in a snow drift in Antarctica or in Jeffrey Dahmer's freezer, this is just wrong. Sophie Wrap/Throw:
Throw converts into a robe. Includes snap and zipper closure to keep you warm. Also available in camel.
Why not carpeting that converts into a prom dress? Or an area rug that converts into a carport? Or, I don't know, a catalog that converts into a gun to shoot yourself with in case someone buys you this thing?