The Sorostine Prophecy

I always hear David Byrne's voice in my head. 'How did I get here?'

Just like in The Celestine Prophecy, I believe everyone we meet and everything we do has purpose. Even if the person or the situation is making us suicidal, as it often does, if we look hard and put down the gun, we can find a chain reaction of reasons that lead us to our next obvious point in time. Even though in that moment we have no idea that it's so obvious.

'Water flowing underground.'

1. I was engaged to be married to a guy I met in Paris, France but who was from San Francisco.
2. We broke up.
3. So I decided to move to San Francisco on the off chance that we might get back together.
4. We did not.
5. While in S.F. I had a relationship with another man who turned out to be a junkie and a felon.
6. We broke up.
7. So I moved back to Paris.
8. I stayed there for 3 years during which time I starred in a musical review.
9. When that ended I couldn’t find another job.
10. So I moved to New York.
11. I started doing standup in New York.
12. I got engaged again.
13. We broke up.
14. So I moved to Los Angeles.
15. I got 6 television shows my first year in L.A.
16. I started my road show, Single, Married & Divorced, and we toured the U.S. for 8 years.
17. I entertained the troops overseas in 6 different countries for three years.
18. During all of this was the Seven Years of Stupid with The Impotentate.
19. We broke up.
20. I then met Elvis, the love of my life.
21. We broke up.
22. So based on the only good sex I’d ever had, with him, I wrote a novel called All the Bad Sex I’ve had, a very, very, very long book.
23. Then I got hired to write for a website.
24. The editor was insane and I wanted to quit after a month.
25. Baby on Bored told me to forget the website and start a blog.
26. I had sworn I would never do a blog.
27. So I quit the website.
28. And started a blog.

So everything that looked like a bump in the road was just a ladder to the next….bump in the road. Would any of those incidents have occurred in a vacuum? Or did one knowingly lead to the next?

'Letting the days go by.'

Most of my bumps were about men. Even though I regret many of those hook-ups, they moved me along to the creative life I was supposed to lead. Since I was 15 years old and fronted my own band, I’ve always been all about my career. And all those failed relationships kept shoving me back onto the yellow brick road. So yes, I know how I got here.

End of Talking Heads chat.